Champions League: The Honeymoon is Over

Oh Champions League,

This is awkward. Our honeymoon period has been shorter than Britney and K-Fed’s marriage. Is it because I even know who Britney and K-Fed are? And technically, technically Champions League we’re still together. Until May! I’ve now had to update our status on Facebook to ‘It’s Complicated’. After such a long courtship (and the breakups), I thought surely you’d want us to stay together for more than the year.

Admittedly, I’ve let myself go a bit. Putting on a few extra pounds. Not fitting into the tight little black number that I used to. It’s not my fault that Dolce and Gabanna refuse to re-tailor it. And sure, I clearly made a muck of my wrongly coloured accessories. But somewhere deep down, I really thought that tie would draw your attention to what was on the pitch.

Look how happy we were together

But that’s all now. You really bailed on me long before that happened. In fact, I actually blame you for the current state of affairs. That’s right. This is your fault. I mean, I tried Champions League. Oh yes, I tried!! 

Munich was amazing. Best day of my life - and probably will be for some time to come. I thought I could keep the momentum going. People were in your ear that you were crazy to get together with me, that I was getting a bit rough around the edges - but you ignored them. But I thought I’d keep you happy and get a little nip and tuck. And what better way to keep the notion of temptation than to use The Garden of Eden (Hazard) as inspiration. And of course keep things really fresh with a brand new Brazilian. How could you resist?

But resist you did Champions League.

And the RAF from Chelsea Shot Them Down

Drogba: Superhero or European
Cup Winning Superhero?

So after football ended for just everyone else last weekend, there was still everything to play for this weekend for a certain little club in London. West Ham. They will now have the privilege of playing European Champions next season, so well done to the Irons. It’s quite an honour.

So with a plucky rag tag bunch of millionaires footballers literally against all the odds, Chelsea did the unthinkable and just went and won themselves the European Cup. Anyone who threw money on them when 3-1 down to Napoli could arguably find themselves in their own yacht next to Roman this summer - in Monaco. Putting his entire pay off on that bet was possibly the best thing AVB has ever done. Who’s really laughing now?

With John Terry removing himself from the penalty shootout whilst in Barcelona, he was still laboured with the task of the players available to RDM for team selection. How would he accomplish this? Typical Terry style team talks ahead of the match and half time? Maybe. Maneuvering his way into the technical area to shout at David Luiz until his curls fall out organize the defense? No. John Terry opted to inspire the team in his versatility of fashion choices. 

Terry has taken his time in the West End too far and had more costume changes than the cast of Wicked. Without actually being able to play, Terry opted to contribute to the occasion in case the actual match got a little dry. How? By living his entire match day through costume.

Terry began in his D&G suit, looking respectable as one expects upon arrival. The next time the camera panned to him, he had moved on to his CL Adidas warm up gear. Other sports good companies are available. And by the time the camera lost interest in Ribery’s shots going so wide that they are now in Frankfurt, he was in his kit. How he didn’t end up trading his shirt with Luiz Gustavo - or at least pretend he did so he could work his patented shirtless armband look while joining Lampard to lift the EUROPEAN CUP. Of course, with Lampard wearing the captain’s armband on the night, it could have created a really awkward moment.