Everton vs Chelsea: The One When Costa Fell in Love & Terry Was a Striker

Love is all around

After starting Wednesday's game against PSG with Chelsea's strongest (available) XI and it resulting in a loss, Guus Hiddink was going to take no chances on Saturday with his impervious domestic unbeaten run. Hiddink rekindled a partnership more uncomfortable than Jerry Hall and Rupert Murdoch - yes, Nemanja Matic and John Obi Mikel found themselves together again.

Rather than bang on about how the combination effectively reduces the effectiveness of either yet again I’ll just leave you with the results which Chelsea have incurred when they have started together

Chelsea vs Everton: The One That Was Offside

Carnage

The insistence of playing John Obi Mikel and Nemanja Matic together reminds me of Rachel’s trifle from Friends. Just because meat is good* and jam is good does not mean they should co-exist in the same dish or on the same pitch.

In theory, the pairing should work to create a glorious fortress of solitude in front of the back four, but for whatever reason it just makes a mess of any semblance of shape and a disconnectedness between the attack and everyone else. They are trying to do the same job, but seemingly in the same place at the same time rather than spreading their considerable size across the pitch. In other words they leave a massive gaping hole for anyone just to have a leisurely stroll through. Which is exactly what Everton did for large expanses of Saturday’s little slice of chaos.

Coming to a Club Near You... Managerial Special

Roman may need to remove Meireles
hair from Hazard's face before showing
him to Pep.

At the time Chelsea were on the brink of a Champions League exit crouching manager hidden ginger was shown the door at Stamford Bridge, there was a need to fill his D&G suit. With managers like Rafa Benitez putting himself forward, there was obvious panic throughout supporters to get someone in because, there was just no physical possibility that he would be able to fit into Villas Boas’ suit. It is unconfirmed that the designers of club sponsored suits, Dolce & Gabanna, have refused to make a suit Rafa size.

Although a lot of other names were bandied about, I decided to investigate the possibility of the man I thought was going to take over last summer, Brendan Rodgers. Speaking to a source close both to the club and Rodgers, it was mentioned that the likelihood would be he would be at “a big club next season.” With hard-pressing subtle follow-up questions like “a big club that plays in blue?”, it’s no surprise the answer was merely a shrug of the shoulders and a wink. Of course this has meant months of smugness quiet confidence. Rodgers has been fantastic at Swansea and although publicly dismissed a move to Chelsea this season, could have been swayed back. So, it’s no surprise after this investigative journalism, that it appears that Brendan Rodgers is on the brink of joining a big club a club that plays in blue Liverpool.

Liverpool had previously been in for Roberto Martinez, but meetings appeared to break down when the big boy papers had nothing to discuss about Martinez except for the poor choice of shoes he wore to the meeting. I’m not implying that John W. is swayed by terrible fashion choices, but after the match reports following their FA Cup loss were more disappointed in Kenneth’s Merseyside formal wear than the poor first hour performance of the club, it’s evident who is making the decisions in the Henry household how much Henry understands about American soccerball football.