Chelsea Back to Winning Ways - in the League!

Transformers: Robots in Disguise

Goodbye weekends, hello football. The thief of any semblance of spare time or money has come back and robbed me. And by robbed me, given me some purpose as I leave my pub stool and lager for, well, a seat inside the ground and lager.* And it certainly didn’t fail to disappoint. Unless of course you are fans of QPR, Norwich, or Liverpool. Those three matches saw thirteen, THIRTEEN! goals from Swansea, Fulham, and West Brom. 

As shocking as that is, it gets even more dramatic. Steve Clarke somehow made an actual striker out of aimlessly large Romelu Lukaku. Not only did he score, but he caused trouble - and not just from standing around and being in the way. Too early to consider him for a position on my fantasy team? Or am I really trying to get you to put him in your fantasy league so I’ll win. Or am I writing this at a pub right now, and have lost all sense of what I’m actually saying? That’s SAF levels of mind games right there.

And in news, that's not really news at all from the Liverpool match. Joe Cole featured for 10 minutes before his hamstring gave up on him. Joe, go back to France. Your hamstring can thank me later.

Of course they weren’t the only ones in action, as friendly neighbours Tottenham and Arsenal were both in action. Not with each other... but you knew that already. AVB has started his campaign by sanctioning one of the few top players that he has which of course resulted him starting life in charge of Sp*rs with a 2-1 defeat at Newcastle. However, to no stranger to impressing supporters of the club he’s in charge of, AVB is weighing up Meireles and Chamakh! No really. It’s a subtle way of winning the Chelsea faithful back, showing them he really does have a sense of humour.

As for Arsenal, it’s almost not funny. Days after they watch their captain head to their closest completion for 3^rd place, they send their next best player off to Barcelona. They hadn’t even named Song captain before he was off. But before you feel too bad for the little ones, bare this in mind - they have now made £121million off of Barcelona in the last 12 years.

As a reward for winning the Champions League, Chelsea’s traveling support were awarded with a trip glorious Wigan, where it was 10 degrees colder than London and dark before 2pm. And the weather, well, it couldn’t have been more gloriously Northern if it had tried. With 2 goals in 6 minutes, it looked like it was going to be a long day for Wigan, but with 2 goals inside the first 8 minutes it was just a long day. There were no real stand out performances on the pitch, although Hazard and Oscar both impressed. And no matter how much RDM loves him, he really needs to let Juan Mata have some form of a break. He’s played through Euros and the Olympics. Roberto - he’s only little. Give him a break. You signed 17 other players that could possibly take his place for a few weeks...

The real story was in the stands. No, not because someone may have been a complete plum, stood on the wrong side of a seat to end up with their foot wedged so hard they needed actual treatment. And that of course is a purely hypothetical instance as we all know, no one could be that big of a div... The Chelsea supporters were in fantastic voice - and with 4700 supporters who made it all the way to Wigan - it really had to be. The song of the day had to be “Victor Moses - we’ll see you next week”. Not only did the player thing it was funny and definitely gave his supporters to be a cheeky grin, but the Wigan supporters actually bothered to reply. How you may ask? Certainly, they’d say something to encourage their only best player to stay. Their reply, of course, “what a waste of money.” I’ll still give them credit for singing - pressure to come up with something quick and that.

Of course, both Manchesters were both in action. City found their way to a win and found a way to keep their kit man very, very busy. After Balotelli’s foray into the world of under armour comedy design, the rest of the City squad has decided to follow his lead. Who knows what’s been printed and not flashed after a goal. Are they forced to wear it week after week until they manage to find the back of the net? And what does this mean for Stefan Savic? 

The other side of Manchester of course got the privileged Sky cash cow that is Monday Night football to show off their latest acquisition. But it was all for nowt as SAF fielded a questionable line up at best, started van Persie in the Owen role and treated us all to a loss to start the season.

And for you lucky Chelsea supporters - you don’t have to wait a week to do it all again, with a mid-week fixture against Reading. Where it will be 20 and raining, just to make you all remember this past weekend fondly.

Crack on with those fantasy teams - you don’t know who’ll be scoring 5 next week.

jb xx

* gin, it’s always gin.